I’m taking a minute this evening to sit outside and enjoy the beautiful sunset. The weather is warm, with a bit of coolness behind it and I can hear thunder off over the ocean. The Cicada’s are making their noise and all feels peaceful.

Inside however, the husband has just put up sheets of plastic in preparation of sanding the final coat of drywall yuck around the new glass door in the kitchen. Tomorrow the kitchen cabinets are being installed. I didn’t really know what to expect with a full kitchen remodel and I guess if I had expected, I would have expected worse. In the past week and a half we have had the electricians, the plumbers (love them), the gas company, a construction company (removing a window and installing a door) and yesterday and today the drywallers. By far, they are the messiest. We also had two of the three appliances delivered today. They are sitting in the living room.

When I mentioned three weeks ago that we were going to embark on a kitchen remodel, I never expected that when we picked out our cabinet design and finalized the floor plan, that they would say…okay… we will be ready in two weeks. We still had everything in our kitchen, no appliances picked out and no sub-contractors lined up. It has been a busy few weeks, but I think I like it this way..short and sweet.. no drawn out process of hurrying up and waiting.

The worse part, except for the drywall mess, has been washing the dishes in the bathroom sink and goodness forbid I say it, eating out! Ugh! I hated eating out before.. now I am really, really over it…lol As is my stomach.

Pictures soon

I may not have what I want yet, but I have the ambition and one day I know I can have it all, and that is enough today.
Shiza

For today’s post, I actually looked up schizo quotes…ha. (No offense if you are schizo…yes it is a very serious condition and one should not joke.) But, it suits my state of mind today.

I think I may suffer from some sort of illness my own self. You see, I know my house is “not how I would like it.” It really, really isn’t that bad, but I see every little thing. I know that this is inherent to my personality, my husband calls is critical. ha.

You know that lately I have been whining lamenting about my house, how it is unorganized, how I am overwhelmed, how I need help. You read how I had a company - girls I know - come in and peruse my house and as we speak I know they are at home laughing developing a plan of action to get me organized. You also read how I am going to call a cleaning company (person) to start cleaning my house. I even called a yard company (a girl I know who does yards) to come and pull weeds and respruce up the mulch.

All good and productive, wouldn’t you say. No illness here. Ha!

Here’s the deal.

As soon as I put my plan into action, I suddenly seem able to do all these things my own self. There something amiss with this, don’t you think? I mean, in Brother’s room, I went in and went through all his baskets, threw a trash bag full of junk away, straightened the closet and washed the sheets. The kitchen, I pulled everything out from underneath the sink, I was looking for the garbage disposal stopper, but while I was there I threw a trash bag full of junk away; scrubbed the counters, organized a cabinet. Outside, I pulled weeds along the fence and “the big ones from the landscape.” My room just needed to be dusted. The office, I had the hub remove a broken desk chair and a broken stand that I though we could fix; course in there I needed the space for the new wine cooler he bought me. What? Its for our kitchen remodel which is coming soon. Sister’s room, ahh, Sister’s room, I bought her heavy duty black trash bags, ha, enough said.

See. I’ve made tremendous progress in just a few hours over a few days. I can do this. This, this is my warped thinking. I know in reality I am just “moving boxes,” but in my head I think it is progress that will make a difference. Ha. bawahaaa. snort. Then the realistic part of me says, Hey, you, schizo, you know what Flylady says, “You can’t organize clutter.” It is sort of the same mental thinking that one has when they see something creative, say like this and think, hey! I can do that. Only I buy all the materials needed and then stuff them into a closet. I have great vision, I’ll give me that.

It’s just that I know me, I am on a I can do it high, but it won’t last. The disorganization is still there, cleaner but still there. The house, yeah, I can get it clean enough for the cleaning lady to come in, but I won’t keep it that way. If I could, I would have already. It’s just that pride thing. I can do it. When in reality…I’m just moving boxes.

Don’t cook. Don’t clean. No man will ever make love to a woman because she waxed the linoleum - “My God, the floor’s immaculate. Lie down, you hot bitch.”
~Joan Rivers

I know I’ve used that quote before…but, it never fails to make me laugh.

So, things are changing here at the Beachy household. Last Friday one of our office assistants put in her two week notice, and of course it had to be the one who took my job a year and a half ago. Which means in about two weeks I will be going back to work while the kids are in school. Everyday. Well, everyday except Friday. Friday will become my day again. I need a day off to run errands, to vedge, to be quiet, to just be…

I am kind of excited about going back to work. Getting out of the house. Being around grown ups. The Hub and I had been discussing me going back a day or two a week for a few months, but now it will be the real deal. One of the things we have been discussing is our working together, I don’t want to work for him hee. Hopefully we can work it out… because we both think it will be good that we are both working in our company together. You know, ownership, stock, common purpose, common gain. (As long as I don’t have to work FOR him…ha.)

One of the things I have been most disappointed about while staying home this past year (+) is that I haven’t accomplished anything with regards to the organizing and cleaning I had envisioned I would be doing after I got well. If anything, after I got well, I became more active in my family and my church and let those things slide into the background. I am grateful that I’ve had the opportunity to study God’s Word consistently and even start women’s group that is helping a lot of women, but a part of me has become overwhelmed by all that I have neglected at home.

This became very evident today.

Today, I had an appointment with a new pest control company because we have been having a problem with grain beetles …we found the source… a box of dog biscuits that we had put in the laundry room and forgot about because Tasha didn’t care for them. However, in order for him to find the source, he had to search through the entire house…. What! An! Eye! Opening! Experience!Looking at your house though someone else’s eyes. Oi’

In addition to that, just before he came I had just opened my house to two girls I had hired to organize my top three trouble spots..the kids rooms and the office. Oi’ Oi’ I keep telling myself, it’s not that bad, it’s not that bad, it’s not that bad…. I might faint. really. over dead. Is it that bad? It’s not that bad.

The first step is admittance right? Oi.

To top things off, yesterday, my husband asked me who I was going to get to clean the house after I went back to work…especially things like the blinds and floors. Neglect. Oi’ It’s everywhere..evident.

Tomorrow I will be looking into a cleaning lady. Stat! Oi’